The Man Question

Today is Christos' funeral.

Our street in Mount Waverley knew him as Chris. For more than 30 years we loved him, and he loved us. But these are just words. You see, Chris' love language was embedded in a literacy of acts of service. We were offered his devotion, without asking; us his neighbours. From a small village in Greece, he came to this country, built his generous brick home, raised a family, became a key part of this community. This became his village, and we his fellow villagers.

Later this morning, my father and I, Chris' two Tamil friends, will make our way to a Greek church, to pay respect and give thanks to a man who was a friend to our family; who gave meaning to being 'a good neighbour'. As we sit together amongst strangers in Oakleigh, we will think of how Chris modelled for us, resettled life for the diaspora; connection and responsibility, in this our new community.

When a tree fell down in the middle of the road, Chris didn't wait for Council to turn up and clear the path. He would get his tools, he would get to work. Watching an old man bend his back and hack away at the fallen limbs, meant us kids couldn't stand by. The beads of sweat on the old man's neck, was the peer pressure that pushed us to roll up our sleeves, lean in.

In a very important sense, Chris showed us what it meant to lead by example, and respond without being called. He seeded us for us kids, what it meant to build a neighbourhood.

Chris, my father, the men of the diaspora, and their innate sense of decency and goodness combined with the imperfections and the grave shortcomings they carry with them, invite us to consider critical questions of immense urgency.

...How would Chris lean into the "Man Question?'' How would Christos tackle the absence of family peace in new and emerging communities? It's not a conversation I had with my late neighbour, but as we say goodbye to him today, I imagine that uncle Chris would want us to lean in without waiting for an invitation, and lead by example and into the uncomfortable.

“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

― Maya Angelou

Join me and others at the Wheeler Centre for...

''The Man Question: Engaging migrant and refugee men in gendered violence prevention''.

https://lnkd.in/gZtyjxf4